Home / Health Insurance / Articles / Parenting / Toddler Development Tips / What To Do When Your Child Is Adamant And Into Physical Violence
Team AckoJan 30, 2025
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Dealing with adamant and physically violent behaviour in children can be incredibly challenging and distressing for parents. Understanding the underlying reasons and knowing how to respond effectively can make a significant difference in managing and improving your child's actions. This guide provides practical advice and insights to help you navigate these behaviours with empathy and patience.
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Dealing with adamant and physically violent behaviour in children can be incredibly challenging and distressing for parents. It's crucial to address these behaviours early on to prevent escalation and ensure your child develops healthy ways to express their emotions. Understanding the underlying reasons for such behaviour and knowing how to respond effectively can make a significant difference in managing and improving your child's actions.
Children exhibit adamant and violent behaviour for various reasons, ranging from frustration and seeking attention to expressing emotions they haven't yet learned to verbalise. Developmental stages play a significant role in this behaviour. For instance, toddlers are known for their tantrums, which can sometimes escalate into physical actions. Recognising that such behaviours are often a normal part of development helps parents approach the situation with empathy and patience.
When your child exhibits violent behaviour, the first step is to ensure everyone’s safety. If your child is being physically violent, gently but firmly separate them from the situation to prevent harm. Staying calm and composed is vital, as your reaction will influence your child’s response. Clearly outline the boundaries and consequences of their actions so they understand what is acceptable and what isn't. Consistency in applying these rules is key to helping your child learn the expected behaviours.
Children often use physical actions to express emotions they can’t articulate, like frustration, anger, or fear. As a parent, it’s essential to understand that this behaviour, while concerning, is often a call for help and guidance. Here are six practical strategies to help you manage, redirect, and understand your child’s behaviour, promoting a calmer and healthier environment for everyone.
Understand the Root Cause: Physical aggression is often a way for children to express frustration, anger, or unmet needs. Identifying the reason behind their behavior can help you address it effectively.
Avoid Encouraging Tantrums: When your child becomes violent, avoid rewarding the behavior. Observe what triggers their aggression and use distractions to redirect their focus.
Model Calm Behavior: Be polite and calm in all interactions, as children often imitate what they see. Your behavior sets an example, so be mindful of your actions and responses.
Limit Exposure to Violent Content: Avoid showing violent movies or TV shows. Children may mimic aggressive behavior they see on screen, so offer age-appropriate content instead.
Correct Aggressive Behavior Promptly: Address violent behavior as soon as you notice it. Use soothing words, calm gestures, or gently pick them up to redirect their emotions.
Engage to Prevent Restlessness: Boredom or restlessness can trigger aggression. Keep your child engaged with activities or offer a nap if they seem overly tired or frustrated.
Here are some long-term strategies to manage your child’s behaviour.
Consistent Discipline and Positive Reinforcement: Consistency in discipline is crucial. Establish a routine that includes positive reinforcement for good behaviour and appropriate consequences for unacceptable actions. This approach helps your child understand that positive behaviour is rewarded, while negative actions have consequences. Positive reinforcement can include praise, rewards, or special privileges, which motivate your child to repeat the good behaviour.
Teaching Emotional Regulation and Coping Skills: Teaching your child to regulate their emotions and develop coping skills is essential. Engage in activities that help them express their feelings constructively, such as drawing, storytelling, or playing with toys. Introduce techniques like deep breathing or counting to ten to help them calm down when they feel overwhelmed. Regularly practising these skills can equip your child with the tools they need to manage their emotions effectively.
Encouraging Open Communication: Fostering an environment of open communication is vital. Encourage your child to talk about their feelings and experiences. Listen actively and empathetically, validating their emotions while guiding them towards healthy ways of expressing themselves. Open communication builds trust and helps your child feel understood and supported.
Sometimes, despite your best efforts, professional support is needed. If your child’s behaviour is extreme or persistent, consulting a paediatrician or child psychologist can provide additional strategies and support. Professionals can offer tailored advice and interventions to help manage and improve your child’s behaviour.
There are various forms of professional support available, including behavioural therapy, counselling, and family therapy. These interventions can address underlying issues contributing to your child’s behaviour and provide strategies for both parents and children to manage and improve the situation.
Building a Supportive and Nurturing Environment: Creating a supportive and nurturing environment is essential for your child’s well-being. Ensure that your home is a safe and loving space where your child feels secure. Consistent routines, positive interactions, and a stable environment can significantly impact your child’s behaviour and emotional health.
Encouraging Positive Social Interactions: Encourage your child to engage in positive social interactions with peers. Arrange playdates, enrol them in group activities, or join local community groups. Positive social interactions help your child develop essential social skills, empathy, and cooperative behaviours.
Providing Opportunities for Physical Activity and Creative Expression: Physical activity and creative expression are crucial outlets for your child’s energy and emotions. Encourage activities like sports, dance, art, or music, which can help them channel their emotions positively. These activities also provide opportunities for fun, relaxation, and personal growth.
Addressing adamant and violent behaviour in children requires patience, persistence, and understanding. By comprehending the root causes, setting clear boundaries, and seeking professional help when necessary, you can guide your child towards healthier ways of expressing themselves. Remember, you are not alone in this journey—support is available to help you and your child navigate these challenges effectively.
Children become physically aggressive more often because they cannot express the complex emotions of frustration, anger, or even the need for their attention. It may also serve as a response to discomfort or boredom.
Sometimes, if you notice carefully, you may identify some forms of trigger points and responses from your child. You may need to look for patterns such as acting aggressively when they are denied something, are bored, or frustrated. This can make it easier for you to respond in a more informed manner.
Do not praise or even encourage aggressive behaviour. Calmly turn your child's attention to something else or remove them from the situation so the aggressive motion can be diffused.
Yes, children are copies of their parents. If you exhibit calmness and show respect towards others, your child is more likely to learn and imitate those habits. Do not respond to aggression with anger or bitterness.
Limitation of violent movies, shows, or games is recommended. The child quickly picks up some acts of violence from the media and replicates them in real life.
When your child acts aggressively, calmly correct the behaviour by explaining why it isn't acceptable. Use soothing words or gentle physical comfort to help them settle down.
Engage your child in activities they enjoy, such as drawing, playing with toys, or going outdoors. A nap or quiet time can also reduce restlessness and prevent aggressive behaviour.
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Disclaimer: This content is for informational purposes only, based on industry experience and secondary sources. It is not a substitute for professional advice. Please consult a qualified expert for health or insurance-related decisions. Content is subject to change, refer to current policy wordings for specific ACKO details.
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